(eerie music) (thunder crashes) (monster laughs evilly) - Good evening boys and ghouls, and welcome to an especially spooky presentation of "The World According to Polka."

Tonight we're throwing a Halloween party at the studio.

We've got some extra special visitors, a whole lot of fun and freakishly frightening music like this next song.

(Jake maniacal laughing) (bright upbeat music) (bright upbeat music continues) ♪ I see the bad moon a-risin' ♪ I see troubles on the way ♪ I see earthquakes and lightnin' ♪ ♪ I see bad times today ♪ Don't go around tonight ♪ Well it's bound to take your life ♪ ♪ There's a bad moon on the rise ♪ (bright upbeat music continues) (bright upbeat music continues) (bright upbeat music continues) (bright upbeat music continues) ♪ I hope you have got your things together ♪ ♪ Hope you are quite prepared to die ♪ ♪ It looks like we're in for nasty weather ♪ ♪ One eye is taken for an eye ♪ Don't go around tonight ♪ Well it's bound to take your life ♪ ♪ There's a bad moon on the rise ♪ ♪ Don't go around tonight ♪ Well it's bound to take your life ♪ ♪ There's a bad moon on the rise ♪ - That was Mike Franklin singing a crisp and creepy tune from Credence Clearwater Revival "Bad Moon Rising."

A perfect song to start tonight's Halloween showcase.

(knocking) I think it's some of our visitors.

Let them in, Igor, let them in.

(hinges squeaking) - Hi there.

- It's Janet Decay and Grim Gorri from the "Hairy Scary Hangout."

Woo-hoo.

- It's great to see you, Jake.

- Welcome to the show.

Please, please, you're the perfect Halloween guests.

Start by telling our viewers what it is you do.

- Oh, well, I'm Janet Decay the Yummy Mummy.

- [Grim] And I'm Grim Gorri the Funky Monkey.

- And together we host - [Together] "The Mummy and the Monkey's Hairy Scary Hangout."

- Friday night's on our YouTube channel.

- [Grim] That's right, and if you're a fan of classic TV shows like "Big Chuck and Lil' John", "Superhost", or "The Ghoul" you just might dig what we're doing.

(laughs) - Yes, our horror hosted show has it all.

Skits, bits, and a scary flick.

- [Grim] That's right.

Don't be shy, stop by and say hi.

- [Together] And we'll see you at the "Hangout."

- Scary movies can be a lot of fun, but they're even more fun watching 'em with you guys.

Now, what do you guys think the appeal is of horror movies?

Of scary movies?

- Hmm.

- Hmm, you know, Jake, I spend many a night wide awake wondering the exact same thing.

What do you think, Janet?

- Well, I think a lot of people like scary movies for the thrill of it.

Kind of like riding a rollercoaster, you know?

It's scary at first but then it ends up being a lot of fun.

- Well, we are on a musical rollercoaster this evening and can you guys usher in our next song.

- [Grim] Our Pleasure, Jake.

(chuckles) That's right everyone, get ready, it's time for the hit of the land, for the graveyard smash.

It's time for the Halloween favorite "The Monster Mash."

- Woo, take it away Chardon Polka Band.

- [Grim] Ooh, Mash, ooh.

(upbeat music) (upbeat music continues) ♪ I was working in the lab late one night ♪ ♪ When my eyes beheld an eerie sight ♪ ♪ For my monster, from his slab, began to rise ♪ ♪ And suddenly, to my surprise ♪ He did the Mash ♪ He did the Monster Mash ♪ The Monster Mash ♪ It was a graveyard smash ♪ He did the Mash ♪ We caught on in a flash ♪ The Monster Mash ♪ He did the Monster Mash ♪ From my laboratory in the Castle east ♪ ♪ To the master bedroom, where the vampires feast ♪ ♪ The ghouls all came from their humble abode ♪ ♪ To get a jolt from my electrodes ♪ ♪ They did the Mash ♪ They did the Monster Mash ♪ The Monster Mash ♪ It was a graveyard smash ♪ They did the Mash ♪ It caught on in a flash ♪ The Monster Mash ♪ They did the Monster Mash ♪ Now, zombies were having fun ♪ The party had just begun ♪ The guests included Wolf-Man, Dracula, and his son ♪ (upbeat music continues) (upbeat music continues) (upbeat music continues) ♪ Now out from his coffin, Drac's voice did ring ♪ ♪ Seems he was troubled by just one thing ♪ ♪ He opened the lid, he shook his fist ♪ ♪ And said, whatever happened to my Transylvania twist ♪ ♪ It's now the Mash ♪ It's now the Monster Mash ♪ The Monster Mash ♪ And it's a graveyard smash ♪ We did the Mash ♪ You'll catch on in a flash ♪ The Monster Mash ♪ They did the Monster Mash ♪ Now everything is cool, Drac's a part of the band ♪ ♪ My Monster Mash it's the hit of the land ♪ ♪ For you, the living, this Mash was meant too ♪ ♪ When you get to my door, tell them Boris sent you ♪ ♪ And you can Mash ♪ You can Monster Mash ♪ The Monster Mash ♪ You'll catch on in a flash ♪ They did the Mash ♪ It's my graveyard smash ♪ The Monster Mash ♪ It's now the Monster Mash ♪ Aa-oo, Monster Mash ♪ Aa-oo, Monster Mash ♪ Aa-oo, Monster Mash ♪ Aa-oo (upbeat music fades) (werewolf howls) - [Grim] Whoo, what a fang-tastic version of the "Monster Mash."

Good going Chardon Polka Band.

Ha ha.

And it is Halloween and everyone loves them some monsters like King Kong.

- And zombies.

- [Grim] And this next fine fellow we got coming up next.

- Ladies and gentlemen, it's Bob Young.

(hinges squeaking) - Hey, happy Halloween everybody.

- Hey, thanks for coming on the show, Bob.

- Hey, of course.

Jake, I have news for you.

- Yeah?

- I've been moonlighting with another band.

- This is, this is ghastly.

- I love Polka and all but I decided to follow my passion with a skeleton based percussion ensemble.

It's spooky stuff.

- Well, I gotta tell you, Bob, I got a real bone to pick with you over this.

- [Grim] Bone.

Not so fast.

I mean, they could be the next Rolling Stones.

- More like Rolling Bones.

(cymbal crashes) (Grim groans) (Janet chuckles) (Igor slapping) - Roll the tape.

(spooky xylophone music) (spooky xylophone music continues) ♪ Spooky, scary skeletons ♪ Send shivers down your spine ♪ Shrieking skulls will shock your soul ♪ ♪ And seal your doom tonight ♪ Spooky, scary skeletons ♪ Speak with such a screech ♪ You'll shake and shudder in surprise ♪ ♪ When you hear these zombies shriek ♪ ♪ We're so sorry skeletons ♪ You're so misunderstood ♪ You only want to socialize ♪ But I don't think we should ♪ 'Cause spooky, scary skeletons ♪ ♪ Shout startling, shrilly screams ♪ ♪ They'll sneak from their sarcophagus ♪ ♪ And just won't leave you be (spooky xylophone music continues) (spooky xylophone music continues) ♪ Spirits supernatural are shy what's all the fuss ♪ ♪ But bags of bones seem so unsafe, it's semi-serious ♪ ♪ Spooky, scary skeletons ♪ Are silly all the time ♪ They'll smile and scrabble slowly by ♪ ♪ And drive you so insane ♪ Sticks and stones will break your bones ♪ ♪ They seldom let you snooze ♪ Spooky, scary skeletons ♪ Will wake you with a boo (spooky xylophone music continues) (spooky xylophone music continues) (spooky xylophone music softens) (spooky xylophone music fades) - That was "Spooky, Scary Skeletons" featuring my friend Jackie Popovec of the band the Vindys.

- A big thanks to Bobby and his Bone Brigade.

Now, just when you think things couldn't get any scarier on the show, we've got a real guitar ghoul joining us.

A musical madman, Mr. Michael Weber.

(thunder crashes) (hinges squeaking) - Jake, it's an honor to be here in the Polka Playhouse.

- Well, thank you for joining us, Mike.

Michael, you're here because you are a scary guy.

- I do my best.

Matter of fact, I've actually scored.

You know, I wrote the music for quite a few horror films.

- Whoa.

So you're an expert when it comes to scary music.

- I like to think so.

We got a new record coming out.

It's called, "I Put a Spell on You."

It's a cover of the Screamin' Jay Hawkins classic and it features you on accordion, the polka master himself.

It's polkadelic.

It's blues, it's rock, it's punk, it's polka.

No one's ever heard the genre of music before.

It's the first time ever.

- Well, there may be a reason no one's ever done it before, but we're gonna find out.

We've got the Michael Weber Show.

- Featuring the Chardon Polka Band.

- With "I Put a Spell on You."

Let's roll it.

(bold music) ♪ I put a spell on you ♪ Because you're mine ♪ Stop the things you do ♪ Well, I ain't lyin' ♪ Yeah, I can't stand ♪ No runnin' around ♪ I can't stand ♪ Oh, puttin' me down ♪ I put a spell on you ♪ Because you're mine (bold music intensifies) (intense bold music continues) (intense bold music continues) ♪ Stop the things you do ♪ Well, I ain't lyin' ♪ Well, I want you, you, you, baby ♪ ♪ Anyhow ♪ And I don't care if you want me ♪ ♪ 'Cause I'm yours right now ♪ I put a spell on you ♪ Because you're mine ♪ Ohh, I put a spell on you ♪ Because you're mine - Petrifying as always, the Michael Weber Show.

- [Grim] Any by the way, buddy, I got one thing to say to ya.

Nice hair.

- Right back at ya.

- Now, Mike, I understand you sustained an injury during that shoot.

- Polkadelic music, it's mighty dangerous.

Mighty dangerous.

- That it does because a piece of the fireplace, we were filming it, fell and struck Michael Weber on the head.

It was fantastic and we're gonna show that clip to you right now.

I know a few of our guests gotta get outta here, but stick around folks we got more spooky music on the way.

♪ Because you're mine (bricks clattering) (Mike groans) ♪ Stop the things you do - All right, we're having quite the Halloween party today.

And if you're gonna have a Halloween party, you need some trick-or-treaters.

Just so happens I know two very cute trick-or-treaters.

Let's bring 'em out.

(hinges squeaking) - [Together] Treat or treat.

- [Jake] Oh, my goodness.

Look who it is.

Look who it is.

Come on over here y'all.

We got.

- Happy Halloween.

- Oh, my God, we got.

They're spinning.

We got Benjamin and Luke my two little boys, my wonderful wife Emily.

- Hi, I'm Emily.

- [Jake] All right, come over here guys.

You got it?

Oh, you're trick-or-treaters, you gotta get some candy.

You gotta get some candy.

There's some for you.

There's some for you.

What do you say?

- [Together] Thank you.

- You are welcome.

Now, okay, let's talk about Halloween, guys.

Look right there.

Tell me, what do you guys like about Halloween?

- Candy.

- Candy?

- [Jake] What do you like about Halloween?

- [Luke] Hey, look in the bowl.

- [Jake] You got more candy in there.

Here.

Now what are you guys dressed up as today?

- Spider.

- A spider?

- Ghost.

- A boo ghost.

Yeah.

Make some spider and ghost noises.

Let's hear 'em.

(children growling and wailing) I've never met a more creepy spider and ghost.

And you could go so far as to say that these are a couple of sharp dressed men.

Did you know that?

You guys are sharp dressed men and we got a little trick-or-treating song about that.

(upbeat music) (upbeat music continues) ♪ Clean shirt, new shoes ♪ I don't know where I am goin' to ♪ ♪ Silk suit, black tie ♪ I don't need a reason why ♪ They come a runnin' just fast as they can ♪ ♪ 'Cause every girls crazy about a sharp dressed man ♪ (upbeat music continues) ♪ Gold watch, diamond ring ♪ I ain't missin' not a single thing ♪ ♪ Cufflinks, stick pin ♪ When I step out, I'm gonna do you in ♪ ♪ They come a runnin' just fast as they can ♪ ♪ 'Cause every girls crazy about a sharp dressed man ♪ (upbeat music quickens) (quick upbeat music continues) (quick upbeat music continues) (quick upbeat music continues) (upbeat music slows) - But we got another special guest coming to the Halloween party.

Shall we see who it is?

- Yeah.

- Let's bring 'em out.

(hinges squeaking) - [Benjamin] Outback Ray.

- Hey, guys.

How's it going?

- That's right everybody it's Outback Ray, an animal expert.

It's Halloween and you've got animals.

Did you bring us kind of a spooky animal today?

- Oh, yeah.

I brought a really spooky animal.

- Is it a snake?

- Yep, it is a snake and you ready?

- You guys ready?

- I brought something extra special, and let's see what we can find.

We're gonna come right over here.

- What do you think it is?

- We're gonna slide it.

- I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't know if I wanna see what's in there.

- We're gonna open it up.

Now, let's take a quick little peek.

- Oh, no.

- Uh-oh, where did he go?

- It's too much.

- [Ray] Do you see anything in there?

- Yeah.

- Oh, my goodness.

Let's see.

We're gonna reach in and bring out my little buddy- - These kids are braver than me.

- named SpongeBob.

Oh, my goodness.

Look at that.

Do you wanna help me pull him out?

Come on guys, help me pull him out.

Hey, let's go, lift.

(groans) Lift.

(groans) - How long is this snake?

- This guy is 11 feet long.

Here we go.

Are you ready?

- An 11 foot snake in the studio today.

- Whoa, look at that you guys.

Here we go, let's spin him around.

- Put him on the ground.

- Yeah.

Now, while his name is SpongeBob, he is a Burmese python.

They're actually one of the largest snakes in the world.

And you know what's really cool about snakes?

Girl snakes get bigger and stronger than the boys.

Yep, this one, he's a boy python.

If this was a girl, she'd be a lot bigger and a lot stronger.

And he's a constrictor too.

- [Jake] What do these things eat?

- In the wild they love to eat ghosts.

Would you like to come up and show everybody how he'd love to swallow a ghost?

So come on up, let's have you stand right here for me.

Turn around.

Can you wave goodbye to everybody?

Say bye, see you later.

Here we go, we're gonna take him.

We're gonna put him right around you just like that.

But hold on, we're not done.

Do you know what he loves also to eat?

- What?

- Spiders.

- Oh, Lukey.

- Oh, my goodness, come on over here for me.

- Let's see ya.

- Yep, turn around so they can all see ya and we're gonna go right around you just like that.

There, is that not amazing or what?

- Oh, my goodness.

- See how cool.

- Friends and neighbors, you never know what's gonna happen on this show.

And maybe you're a little bit spooked out by snakes.

I know I am.

And when you get scared, it's good to have people around you that you love.

This is a song about that.

It's perfect for Halloween, it's called "Stand by Me."

Remember that when things get a little spooky.

(mellow music) (mellow music continues) ♪ When the night has come ♪ The land is dark ♪ And the moon is the only light that we'll see ♪ ♪ Oh, I won't be afraid ♪ I won't be afraid ♪ Just as long as you stand, stand by me ♪ ♪ Darling, darling ♪ Stand by me, oh, honey won't you stand by me ♪ ♪ Oh, won't you stand, stand by me ♪ ♪ Stand by me (mellow music continues) (mellow music continues) (mellow music continues) (mellow music quickens) (quick mellow music continues) (quick mellow music continues) (quick mellow music continues) ♪ Now if the sky that we look upon ♪ ♪ If it should crumble and fall ♪ ♪ Or the mountains should tumble into the sea ♪ ♪ Wa-ha, I won't cry, I won't cry ♪ ♪ Oh, no, I won't shed a tear ♪ As long as you stand, stand by me ♪ ♪ Darling, darling ♪ Stand by me, oh, honey won't you stand by me ♪ ♪ Oh, won't you stand, stand by me ♪ ♪ Stand by me ♪ Darling, darling ♪ Stand by me, oh, honey won't you stand by me ♪ ♪ Oh, won't you stand, stand by me ♪ ♪ Stand by me - All right goblins, this has been a special Halloween presentation of "The World According to the Polka."

We'd like to thank The Mummy and the Monkey, Michael Weber, the Bone Brigade, our buddy Outback Ray, and the whole crew.

Thanks for hanging out with us tonight.

Y'all have a happy and safe Halloween.

That's how we do it on "The World According to Polka."

And you guys are gonna help me, we got one more thing to say.

Party on Ghoul.

- [All] Party on Ghouls.

(upbeat music) ♪ Girl, you really got me now ♪ You got me so I don't know what I'm doing ♪ ♪ Oh, yeah, you really got me now ♪ ♪ You got me so I can't sleep at night ♪ ♪ Oh, yeah, you really got me now ♪ ♪ You got me so I don't know where I'm going now ♪ ♪ Oh, yeah, you really got me now ♪ ♪ You got me so I can't sleep at night ♪ ♪ You really got me ♪ You really got me ♪ You really got me ♪ Please don't ever let me be ♪ I only wanna be by your side ♪ Oh, please, don't ever let me be ♪ ♪ I only wanna be by your side ♪ Oh, yeah, you really got me now ♪ ♪ You got me so I don't know where I'm going now ♪ ♪ Oh, yeah, you really got me now ♪ ♪ You got me so I can't sleep at night ♪ ♪ You really got me ♪ You really got me ♪ You really got me (upbeat music continues) (upbeat music continues) (upbeat music continues) ♪ Oh, girl, you really got me now ♪ ♪ You got me so I don't know what I'm doing now ♪ ♪ Oh, yeah, you really got me now ♪ ♪ You got me so I can't sleep at night ♪ ♪ Oh, yeah, you really got me now ♪ ♪ You got me so I don't know where I'm going, yeah ♪ ♪ Oh, yeah, you really got me now ♪ ♪ You got me so I can't sleep at night ♪ ♪ You really got me ♪ You really got me ♪ You really got me (upbeat music crescendos)